DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES star TERI HATCHER complains her lovelife is "nightmarish" because she has been without romance for nearly a year.

The screen siren bemoans spending the last nine months on her own, because she is fed up of having to "roll over to an empty slot in bed".

She tells Ladies' Home Journal, "I don't want to get married. But I want to be monogamous and I want to be with somebody I can trust and I can really divulge who I am, and all my secret fabulous mysterious passions, some of them dark and some of them not."

But however desperate the star may be, 41-year-old Hatcher insists she'd never look for love on the internet - despite having put a lot of thought into her potential profile.

She jokes, "It would have to have the word 'desperate' in it, as well as funny and creative and smart and spontaneous. And sexy. But can you imagine the National Enquirer? That would be fun."