Page 6 of 9 FirstFirst ... 23456789 LastLast
Results 76 to 90 of 124

Thread: Food At Potlucks--Opinion

  1. #76
    Elite Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    4,336

    Default

    Laurent & Brookie, I used to be like that. But I was single for so many years, I really didn't know HOW to host a big party. Just the thought of it stressed me out. It wasn't until I had kids that I think I mastered the skill of multi-tasking (haha). It seems second nature now to always be doing 100 things at once. Stress. Hell, I live daily with it, doesn't even phase me anymore. Also, my husband is a total people person. He loves having barbecues during football season and Super Bowl parties. For him, the more the merrier. So I think he helped me change in that regard, helped me become more of a party person/organizer.

  2. #77
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Burning Down Your Windmill
    Posts
    49,359

    Default

    Other than the Super Bowl, I very very rarely offer to host things. I'm not the girly type and i hate planning that kind of stuff. I'm happiest if someone just tells me what they need help with. No social anxiety or anything, its just not my thing. When I do it I do a pretty good job of it, if I say so myself.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

  3. #78
    Elite Member MontanaMama's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Evading P6 & P7
    Posts
    13,275

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by LynnieD View Post
    Alright, let me ask you all this, since we all seem to know/be related to someone like PG is talking about:

    Do the moochers/freeloaders/tardy assholes YOU guys know EVER HOST anything themselves? OR, ever initiate a family function or event? Could be a birthday party or whatever.

    Because the one I know (who is 37 yrs old) has never once invited a single person to her house, for ANYTHING, nor ever made a single thing to take to any family get together and still shows up late, etc. Everyone else hosts Thanksgivings/Xmas, BBQ's etc--she has will not. And its not about the size of the house either...

    Just wondering if anyone else sees this and if perhaps its all related...
    It seems to me that some people just don't have social grace and can feel very intimidated by being around such "capable" family members who always have things under control. I never hosted anything for a long time because I wasn't sure about my cooking, or hostessing skills, whatever and at family events I didn't use to help much because because I thought I would get in the way or not do something the right way. I finally figured out that if I help in the kitchen or do the cooking or host an event, I don't have to get involved in small talk stuff that I really hate.


    Quote Originally Posted by Lobelia View Post
    Lynnie, to be fair, I think that some people are just really nervous at the thought of hosting a large gathering and they think they can't pull it off. Some people have social anxiety and can't handle gatherings well at all, so I kind of understand the get there late/leave early thing. However it doesn't excuse bad behavior while they are there.
    Yup!

    Quote Originally Posted by PrettyGirl View Post
    Lynnie, to answer your question, no, my cousin NEVER hosts anything. That I know of, she's never paid for anything either. I've never heard that she's taken any of our other relatives out for lunch or dinner and taken the tab. Not even taken our grandparents out which many of us have done, especially my grandmother when she was alive.

    Fgg, we hardly ever have leftovers. It's usually the paper items. But if we have chips, liters of soda, etc.. left over non-perishable items that we can use, we keep them for the next get-together. We've all been in agreement about that too. Even bags of charcoal, we keep them for the next party. And in our instance we have the reunion in July.

    Trixie, me and you think alike..lol
    PG, you've been asked a couple of times if this cousin has the means to contribute in a way that makes sense. Does she? Since you and a few other cousins seem to be the family organizers, she may not feel like part of it and since you do this a lot, I guess everyone has their jobs and things run with a certain flow - where would she legitimately fit in? Frankly, you're distaste for this family member comes off in waves, so I guess you don't hide the eye rolling and and under the breath comments in her presence either. Heck you're annoyed that she said she enjoyed herself over Memorial Day. If you actually want to improve the situation, you really should speak to her privately and at a time when an event is not being planned, and then listen to what she has to say about her interactions with the family.
    If i hear one more personal attack, i will type while drunk, then you can cry! - Bugdoll
    (716): I'd call her a cunt, but she doesn't seem to have the depth or warmth
    Quote Originally Posted by shedevilang View Post
    (Replying to MontanaMama) This is some of the smartest shit I ever read

  4. #79
    Gold Member Baby Face's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Pacific Northwest (USA)
    Posts
    1,477

    Default

    At the heart of it all Diane has pissed the family off to the point that there isn't anything she could do right. She is danmed if she does and damned if she doesn't. No wonder she doesn't.
    Silence may be golden but, duct tape is cheaper.

  5. #80
    Elite Member january's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Posts
    7,255

    Default

    It's funny, I never go to a party thinking I'm going to take back what I brought. I've actually never been to a party where the host/hostess kept everything, either. Usually things are divvied up between the guests and people take a little bit home, and the host/hostess keeps some as well. Most of the time when I host I get really cheap tupperware so I can make sure to pack everyone a to-go meal with the leftovers, unless people insist that they don't want any, which is absolutely fine as well.

    I do get the OP because people who take advantage of the kindness of others really grate on my nerves. I agree with almost all of Lobelia's posts on this thread. People donate in all different ways and some people can't afford to bring a lot of food, which absolutely is fine - but if I were in that scenario, I sure as hell would make sure that I pitched in to help clean, etc., so I didn't feel like I was taking advantage of the generosity of others. I don't think anyone really cares how much you bring, how much you eat, or if you come a little late, as long as you aren't perpetually taking advantage - then it becomes a lightbulb moment. I don't know, I just couldn't imagine doing this to anyone, it's really bizarre behavior.
    Women ain't gonna let a thing like sense fuck up their argument. - Chris Rock

  6. #81
    Elite Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    4,336

    Default

    MontanaMama, yes, she has the means to contribute. She has a job, doesn't pay rent. She pays the utilities at her mom's house. She does have a car payment. She still manages to go on vacation several times a year. Her father is from Texas so she's always flying back there to see her father's side of the family and she spends weeks there. She's also going on vacation to Arizona she said next week. I have no idea who she knows in Arizona. I believe I overheard someone say she was staying with a friend there. She also went to visit a co-worker she had who'd relocated to Colorado a few years back. The lady moved out there and my cousin flew out to visit her. She never rents hotels (in case that's the next question..lol). She either stays with family or people she knows. So I'm assuming she has to have some money to be able to fly to these places. She isn't destitute.

    Believe me, we have asked her if she wants to have a larger part in the planning but she basically says no. She says she's too busy, has to work, etc....I don't know if they are excuses, but bottom line she doesn't want to be part of the organization. Obviously, we're not going to force her. It's her choice if she doesn't want to play a larger role. The day of Memorial Day, the day before I specifically told her 'Go early. Don't show up 3 or 4 hrs later okay?' She said no, that she's not going to wake up early. She said that. She said her church had a picnic that day also but she wasn't sure if she wanted to go to that either because it was still too early for her. Even when events aren't early and they're held later in the day or evening she still shows up hours later though.

    I don't think this is a matter of anyone 'hosting' any of these family get-togethers. I'm not hosting them. My cousin Jessica is the one who initially started this and basically asked for volunteers, a party committee of sorts. I was one of the persons who volunteered. So it's roughly 5 or 6 of us. But everyone gets the memo of who's bringing what, the time, where, etc..

    Our distaste is for what she does. I can't make it any more clear. It's not that we hate her. As myself and a few people have said it is tacky. But, obviously, there are people who are just like that. When my grandmother died in 2007, my grandfather's sisters chipped in to pay for the casket. My grandmother was their sister-in-law and that was nice of them. We're talking of little old ladies who paid for it. Well, us grandkids sent up a contribution for the huge floral arrangement that goes on top of the coffin. Also, floral arrangements for the church. I'm sure many of you know, those can be quite pricey. The majority of the grandkids gave money. Diane did not. The others who didn't were mostly the grandkids that were out of town and had to fly drive down from L.A. or New Mexico and we didn't expect them to.

  7. #82
    Elite Member Bellatheball's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    17,107

    Default

    Our distaste is for what she does. I can't make it any more clear. It's not that we hate her.
    Are you sure you are (or can) make a distinction between the two? It doesn't sound like it. Frankly, if someone's continued behavior pisses you off so much, it's hard to imagine you like them on any level.

  8. #83
    Elite Member Chalet's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    13,079

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by PrettyGirl View Post
    Laurent & Brookie, I used to be like that. But I was single for so many years, I really didn't know HOW to host a big party. Just the thought of it stressed me out. It wasn't until I had kids that I think I mastered the skill of multi-tasking (haha). It seems second nature now to always be doing 100 things at once. Stress. Hell, I live daily with it, doesn't even phase me anymore. Also, my husband is a total people person. He loves having barbecues during football season and Super Bowl parties. For him, the more the merrier. So I think he helped me change in that regard, helped me become more of a party person/organizer.
    Yes, I'm being picky here but I don't care. Better that it's ignored because I need to vent. This is the shit that I cannot stand.

    To be single and not know how to do things until one becomes a wife and mother is a choice. People learn to cook and host parties because they want to do it. People do not always multitask with stress. The word stress has become glamorized.

  9. #84
    Elite Member VenusInFauxFurs's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Back in the boxed wine.
    Posts
    21,279

    Default

    I fucking love Chalet.
    When your daughter plays "House," she pretends to be an annoying doctor with a pill-addiction and a limp.

  10. #85
    Elite Member shedevilang's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    louisiana
    Posts
    16,694

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by VenusInFauxFurs View Post
    I fucking love Chalet.
    vouch +1 to the elevnty and all that shit
    Silly bitches, twitchy links are NOT for kids!-Mel

  11. #86
    Elite Member Brookie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    In the "D"
    Posts
    21,033

    Default

    Yeah, I'm single and I multi-task every day. I just don't entertain. The two are not mutually exclusive.
    Life is short. Break the Rules. Forgive Quickly. Kiss Slowly. Love Truly.
    Laugh Uncontrollably. And never regret ANYTHING that makes you smile.

    - Mark Twain

  12. #87
    Elite Member Palermo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Nor Cal
    Posts
    9,471

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Beeyotch View Post
    I think it's more about the attitude, perceived or real or misinterpreted, than about the food.
    I get that, but what's the point, who really changes somebody else's attitude, doesn't happen that often and meanwhile it only hurts you

  13. #88
    Elite Member Mel1973's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Cuntopia
    Posts
    42,951

    Default

    "Well, us grandkids sent up a contribution for the huge floral arrangement that goes on top of the coffin. Also, floral arrangements for the church. I'm sure many of you know, those can be quite pricey. The majority of the grandkids gave money. Diane did not."
    Why does everyone in your family know everything there is to know about Diane - financially. "No rent, pays utilities, has a car note, vacations, didn't contribute to grandma's funeral wreath"? WTF is that?

    And no, I'm not a pushover but... family is family. I have 5 brothers, one of which is typically my closest neighbor. Several of whom have lived with me when they didn't have jobs, a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out. I paid for everything because, in the end, that's what you do. You do it and you don't throw it up in their faces. God forbid, I should someday be in that situation.
    Kill him.
    Kill her.
    Kill It.
    Kill everything... that IS the solution!
    П(_)П
    twitchy molests my signature!

  14. #89
    Elite Member Lobelia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    a backwards hillbilly state
    Posts
    20,801

    Default

    I wouldn't do that for every member of my family. There are a few I don't like. I'm not close to them, I don't trust them and I'm pretty sure they wouldn't carry me through hard times either. Just because someone is related to you, it doesn't mean that you're obligated to turn a blind eye when they show disrespect to everyone in the family.

    As for them knowing everything to know about Diane, I think everything you listed is pretty easy for everyone to just see, without being nosy or snooping. Re the flowers, when you take the entire amount and divide it up between family members, everyone is pretty much gonna know who gave and who didn't. I dunno Mel, I think maybe you have a stronger loyalty to your family than I do, I guess. There are some I'd take care of, like you'd describe, and some I wouldn't.
    "I've cautiously embraced jeggings"
    Emma Peel aka Pacific Breeze aka Wilde1 aka gogodancer aka maribou

    Yip, yip, yip in your tiny indignation. Bark furiously on, lady dog.

  15. #90
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    fellow traveller
    Posts
    51,109

    Default

    pretty girl, stop pretending you like diane. it's ok if you don't. i have a cousin i can't stand, too. she's a useless waste of air who married another waste of air and all they do is pop babies out while her parents support them because neither she nor her useless husband have ever had a job. and she's dumb and has a lousy personality. but i've hated her for as long as i've known her, even before she grew up to be useless. as toddlers, when our parents tried to get us to play together (we're the same age) i wanted nothing to do with her.
    you'll feel much better when you just admit it.

    that said, you also have to stop letting that shit get to you. like other said, either you and your other relatives tell diane she has to stop being such a free-loading cow or she's not getting invited to anything anymore, or you just let it go and accept that she is what she is and will continue to show up late and eat for 3 and never contribute.
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

Page 6 of 9 FirstFirst ... 23456789 LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. I need an opinion, please...
    By messeyme in forum New Members
    Replies: 87
    Last Post: December 13th, 2010, 03:52 PM
  2. What's your opinion of permanent makeup?
    By Honey in forum Beauty and Skincare
    Replies: 24
    Last Post: March 19th, 2008, 02:30 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •