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Thread: Carpet muncher arrested in Burlington Coat Factory

  1. #1
    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    Default Carpet muncher arrested in Burlington Coat Factory

    Police: Man on meth charged after eating carpet lint at department store

    April 29, 2013 12:57 PM EDT





    LOUISVILLE, Ky. -A man is charged after police said he was eating lint out of the carpet at Burlington Coat Factory.
    According to the arrest report, 50-year-old Jeffrey Wagner was alone in the shoe section eating pieces of lint out of the carpet.
    Officers reported that Wagner had dilated eyes, slurred speech and was unsteady on his feet.
    Police said Wagner admitted to smoking crystal meth and had drugs in his possession.
    According to the report, Wagner had Lorotabs, a bag of crystal meth, one bag of unknown pills and one bag of an unknown white powder.
    He is charged with possession of a controlled substance and public intoxication.
    Police: Man on meth charged after eating carpet lint at department store

    I was amused.

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  2. #2
    Elite Member KrisNine's Avatar
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    LOL!!! Best thread title.
    louiswinthorpe111 likes this.

  3. #3
    Elite Member msdeb's Avatar
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    is it against the law to eat carpet lint?
    Basic rule of Gossip Rocks: Don't be a dick.Tati
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    Elite Member Brookie's Avatar
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    Hope not; my entire house is carpeted. Send him over.
    msdeb likes this.
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    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Sure you mean the flooring Brookie.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

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  6. #6
    Elite Member Brookie's Avatar
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    Yes I do, ya perv.
    Life is short. Break the Rules. Forgive Quickly. Kiss Slowly. Love Truly.
    Laugh Uncontrollably. And never regret ANYTHING that makes you smile.

    - Mark Twain

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by msdeb View Post
    is it against the law to eat carpet lint?
    Maybe it is considered bestiality, if he orally copulates with a dust bunny.

  8. #8
    Elite Member Quazar's Avatar
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    I have a few sweaters he can have for a snack - saves me from using the lint roller.
    The more people I encounter, the more I like my animals.

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    So not that type of carpet.

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