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Thread: Elizabeth Smart: Abstinence-Only Education Kept Me From Running Away

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    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    Default Elizabeth Smart: Abstinence-Only Education Kept Me From Running Away






    Elizabeth Smart: Abstinence-Only Education Kept Me From Running Away

    Speaking at a forum on human trafficking at Johns Hopkins University, kidnapping and rape survivor Elizabeth Smart offered personal insight into why someone in an ordeal similar to the one she endured would have a hard time running away from their captor.



    Smart was abducted from her home by Brian David Mitchell when she was 14 years old and held as a sex slave for nine months until she was spotted walking down the street with Mitchell and safely rescued.

    At the forum, Smart talked about her upbringing in a Mormon home and her sexual education at the hands of a school teacher who emphasized abstinence-only as a means of contraception, comparing premarital sex to chewing gum.


    "I thought, “Oh my gosh, I’m that chewed up piece of gum, nobody re-chews a piece of gum. You throw it away,'" Smart told the crowd, recalling how her own rape made her feel "so dirty and so filthy."


    She went on:
    And that’s how easy it is to feel like you no longer have worth, you no longer have value. Why would it even be worth screaming out? Why would it even make a difference if you are rescued? Your life still has no value.

    Since being recovered in March, 2003, Smart has worked hard to put her life back together, eventually marrying and starting a foundation dedicated to educating children about sex crimes.


    The Elizabeth Smart Foundation teaches children that "you will always have value and nothing can change that," she said.
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    Elite Member MsDark's Avatar
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    Yeah this whole "once you've had sex (unless it was on your wedding night) you're ruined/used goods" horseshit that my parents + religion shoved down my throat growing up is what screwed me up for awhile when I was a teen.

    So every female who manages to discover sex (or has sex thrust upon them...no pun intended) for the first time in any other manner but a wedding night should just roll over and die. Or resign herself to being a whore. Yes, I know this sounds bizarre and archaic, but even when I was young (and I'm not that old FFS) this way of thinking prevailed. So after a spell of depression...but ultimately still liking myself a bit too much to want to die...I was on track to settling for whoredom.

    But then I realized how stupid and silly this virginity-worshipping shit was. Now it just pisses me off that I was robbed of a couple of good years (ages 17-19) I should have been able to have fun slutting it up guilt-free. Maybe more, since I probably would have had sex with my boyfriend I was with at age 15 (which would have been awesome...or at least a way better 1st experience...it's not like we hadn't done other stuff) if I hadn't been conditioned to wait.
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    Elite Member louiswinthorpe111's Avatar
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    ^^I kinda feel the same way. My mom wasn't religious by any means, but made me super paranoid about gettting pregnant. So I started dating hubby senior year and here we are 25 years later. If I would have known then what I know now, I would have been a lot sluttier myself.
    deenz and Air Quotes like this.
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    Elite Member Laurent's Avatar
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    "I thought, “Oh my gosh, I’m that chewed up piece of gum, nobody re-chews a piece of gum. You throw it away,'" Smart told the crowd, recalling how her own rape made her feel "so dirty and so filthy."
    That's so awful and I hate the idea that anyone would feel like that.
    MmeVertigina likes this.
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    Elite Member KrisNine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Laurent View Post
    That's so awful and I hate the idea that anyone would feel like that.
    I know, it's awful.

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    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    I regret nothing, and I was a virgin until 21.
    levitt, SuriCruise and Bluebonnet like this.
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    Elite Member MohandasKGanja's Avatar
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    She's a textbook example of someone taking a horrific experience and using it to achieve something great and beneficial for other people.

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    For years I wondered if Smart's upbringing had anything to do with why she stayed with the creepy couple, seeing as how they traveled so much and Smart had so much contact with the outside world. She makes me proud that someone can take a horrible experience and turn it into a positive life goal. What a champion!
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrsDark View Post
    Yeah this whole "once you've had sex (unless it was on your wedding night) you're ruined/used goods" horseshit that my parents + religion shoved down my throat growing up is what screwed me up for awhile when I was a teen.

    So every female who manages to discover sex (or has sex thrust upon them...no pun intended) for the first time in any other manner but a wedding night should just roll over and die. Or resign herself to being a whore. Yes, I know this sounds bizarre and archaic, but even when I was young (and I'm not that old FFS) this way of thinking prevailed. So after a spell of depression...but ultimately still liking myself a bit too much to want to die...I was on track to settling for whoredom.

    But then I realized how stupid and silly this virginity-worshipping shit was. Now it just pisses me off that I was robbed of a couple of good years (ages 17-19) I should have been able to have fun slutting it up guilt-free. Maybe more, since I probably would have had sex with my boyfriend I was with at age 15 (which would have been awesome...or at least a way better 1st experience...it's not like we hadn't done other stuff) if I hadn't been conditioned to wait.
    It always seemed, based from some of the super religious folks I know, is that there is a RAGING double standard, when it comes to this abstinence shit. If the sons slip up, it's not THEIR fault, it was that slut girl who tempted them. If the daughter was the one that messed up, SHE was branded the slut. None of the guys that I knew, that were super religious, got the whole "damaged goods" spiel, they got the delightful "women are evil temptresses" shit instead.

    I always felt so sad for my girlfriends that were super religious. It just seemed that they missed out on so many interesting life experiences, because their parents taught them, that staying a virgin until married was THE ultimate goal.
    SuriCruise likes this.

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    Elite Member Quazar's Avatar
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    Damn. We women have to put up with so much crap. It comes at us from every angle.
    Chilly Willy and Honey like this.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Quazar View Post
    Damn. We women have to put up with so much crap. It comes at us from every angle.
    And these people TOTALLY ignore the fact that Lillith, NOT Eve, was Adam's first wife. Lillith was a sassy little minx, she probably burned her fig leaf undergarments on the regular.

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    Elite Member Air Quotes's Avatar
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    I love that she is using this horrific experience to help people, she's awesome.
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    It may just be me,...but everytime I see this young woman, I feel like she tries to hard to seem okay and together. Like more is going on underneath that she may be hiding. Maybe not,...I just may be to suspicious. Something just feels off to me with her and her Dad. When you see him he is always lurking behind her and looking like he is about to cry. It just bugs me everytime I see them.

    Anyway,...it is great that she is an advocate and voice for the victims of these terrible crimes.

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    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    I cannot even begin to fathom the guilt her father must be feeling, even though he did nothing that caused her to be kidnapped.
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    Elite Member Ravenna's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Air Quotes View Post
    I love that she is using this horrific experience to help people, she's awesome.
    Yes, I like her for that and also for telling Nancy Grace to fuck off-- in politer language of course.
    C_is_for_Cookie likes this.

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