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Thread: Dude arrested for raping a donkey; not Eddie Cibrian

  1. #1
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Default Dude arrested for raping a donkey; not Eddie Cibrian


    Thursday, October 27th 2011





    Some things you just can't find in a Lonely Planet travel guide. Here's one of those things: In the Zimbabwe town of Zvishavane exists the wrong stuff that when snorted or smoked causes your brain to seep out the kind of fuckery-coated hallucinations that not even Alan Ball could dream up. That is one of my only explanations for why this happened.

    The Sun (of course) reports that a 28-year-old nasty ass fucker namedSunday Moyo (quick side whisper: that's a really good drag name) was arrested on Monday in Zvishavane after he was caught doing a donkey the way no bitch should do a donkey without getting permission from said donkey first. The police found Sunday performing a sex act on the donkey who was lying on the floor while tied to a tree. Earth to PETA, stop photographing F-list titties and get on this. Shit.

    Sunday was charged with bestiality and the court ordered him to undergo a psychiatric evaluation. Why must his head be analyzed by mental health professionals, you ask? Well, first of all, he raped a donkey. Second of all, the power of crazy was with him in full force when he told the court the reason for why he fucked a donkey:
    "Your worship, I only came to know that I was being intimate with a donkey when I got arrested.
    I had hired a prostitute and paid US$20 for the service at Down Town nightclub, and I don't know how she then became a donkey. I think I am also a donkey. I do not know what happened when I left the bar, but I am seriously in love with the donkey."

    Why do I have a feeling that this same speech came out of Brenda Song'smouth when her mother asked her why she was marrying Trace Cyrus?



    I will never understand bestiality. never.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

  2. #2
    Elite Member SHELLEE's Avatar
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    Fucking disgusting.
    See, Whores, we are good for something. Love, Florida
    #fingersinthebootyassbitch

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    Elite Member CornFlakegrl's Avatar
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    lmFao at the thread title!

  4. #4
    Elite Member Butterfly's Avatar
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    Gross. Poor donkey.
    ><((((>. . `.><((((>><((((>`..`...><((((>.`.. ><((((> `..`...><((((>

  5. #5
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    wait, so he was blowing a donkey?
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

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    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    "The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge."

    -- Stephen Hawking

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    Elite Member Air Quotes's Avatar
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    Love love love the title for this.
    "A true whore just loves her life." - Sluce

  8. #8
    Gold Member Brandy Alexander's Avatar
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    Yep, definitely the best thread title of the day

    The actual story, though, ewwww, gross...
    "I'm not allowed within 200 feet of a school. Or a Chuck-E-Cheese..." Alan - The Hangover

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    Elite Member Kat Scorp's Avatar
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    Best title for a thread. Ever.


    Glad they caught this sick fuck.
    Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its bum"?


  10. #10
    Elite Member OrangeSlice's Avatar
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    I just choked on a carrot after reading this thread title!
    "Schadenfreude, hard to spell, easy to feel." ~VenusinFauxFurs

    "Scoffing is one of my main hobbies!" ~Trixie

  11. #11
    Elite Member Honey's Avatar
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    Gross Hate animal abusers

  12. #12
    Hit By Ban Bus!
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    Are we certain he fucked a donkey or was it really Leann Rimes?

  13. #13
    Elite Member FashionVictim's Avatar
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    Now we know how Matthew Broderick feels

  14. #14
    Elite Member SHELLEE's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Honey View Post
    Gross Hate animal abusers
    Me Too!
    Quote Originally Posted by FashionVictim View Post
    Now we know how Matthew Broderick feels
    See, Whores, we are good for something. Love, Florida
    #fingersinthebootyassbitch

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