The Legend of Toothy Tile - Page 8

sauron · February 18th, 2006, 10:14 PM

Ok,

the table reference has been explained as follows:

Before the Toothy Tile thing came up, Ted had this to say about Jakey:

Jake Gyllenhaal, grabbin' some Cali-esque grub at Basix Café. Boys Town. Gabbing fer days with a guy-pal, Jake-poo, decked out in a white sweatshirt hoodie and jeans, covered up his buzzed noggin with a red baseball cap. The sensitive hunks lingered on fer over an hour, smiling, exchanging childhood stories--with a bit of misty-eyed emotion even? Hey, take it up with my WeHo Desk, 'kay?

3/10 [Beginning of TT Saga]:

Okay, sugar-muffins, the only reason this one's in the Vice section is because until quite recently, Toothy Tile was dating his superpopular, superannoyingly perfect girlfriend. Not boyfriend. Which, if you ask this old gossip whore, is the classification Tile would prefer his significant others be filed under in the very near future.

Mere days ago, while everyone was hooting and complaining about this gown and that host from the Oscars, Tile was right out in the open holding hands with his man in a West Hollywood restaurant--which shall remain nameless...because I love going there and they probably won't serve me anymore if I start outing their customers, ca-friggin'-peesh?

Not that I'd be outting anybody, anyway. Mr. Tile took care of that himself. Covertly, but he did it.

It was late in the afternoon; everybody had cleared out. Save Tile and his man-amigo, who extended his hands flat on the marble table (yes, that's a hint) until they were intertwined with Tile's. Massive smiles then appeared on both daring dudes.

Too sweet! And such a departure for this debauched department, doncha think? Don't worry, as sure as Tile's famous ex knew, deep down, way below her doable dimples, what Tile really wanted (hence, the breakup), next week, we'll be right back on salacious patrol, damn sure.

And it ain't: Tobey M, Keanu Reeves, Jamie Foxx

Ok now see this:

http://www.basixcafe.com/

look at the pic of the table. a great beginning, but no end yet!

Thanks to ONTD For this!!

http://community.livejournal.com/ohn...t/2890039.html

SVZ · February 18th, 2006, 10:44 PM

welcome to the forums sauron

sauron · February 18th, 2006, 10:55 PM

thanks!

muchlove · February 18th, 2006, 11:22 PM

Ooooh, thanks for pointing that out, Sauron!

sauron · February 19th, 2006, 01:15 AM

you're welcome,

this TT thing is far from over, even though ted has become a mum on the subject. He still baits at JG every chance he gets:

here's a snip:

Dear Ted:
Honey, pull back on the Madonna ass kissing. She never was and never will be Cher!
Mike, a true fag

Dear Genuine Fruit:
What, so I'm imitation fagola? There's room for at least three gay icons in my book, just as long as we include Jake Gyllenhaal, 'kay? (For that spittle love scene alone!)

so, yeah.. even though TC is not talking about TT, he still seems to push something (grudge, maybe), against Jake.

source: http://eeverythingentertainment.com/...06/060217.html

also, gay icons don't have to be gay, but just a thought that he could be insinuating (Spelling?) something else.

WickedHo · February 19th, 2006, 12:48 PM

See, this is why I don't think it's Jake:

"Dear Ted:
Toothy Tile has to be Topher Grace.
Charlotte Hamilton
Chicago

Dear Midwestern Dick:
Why? Do you know something I don't? Do tell. Besides, I said handsome, not cute. Big, big diff, darlin'."

I would define Jake Gyllenhaal as "cute," not "handsome." So color me clueless...

Does JG fit these descriptions??? I just don't think so...

3/31
Dear Ted:
Is Toothy Tile speed racer Matt Damon? He has a great smile, and people are always joking that he and Ben are "together."
H. King
San Diego

Dear Good Will Guesser:
Nope, but you are very close, pumpkin. Deliciously so.

4/7
Dear Ted:
Are you seriously telling me no one has guessed the identity of Toothy Tile from One Adorable Blind Vice and last week's Whoa, Nellie! item? It is Michael Vartan, of course. His Jennifer moved on up--it is so obvious.
Jill D.
Calgary, Alberta, Canada

Dear Detective Dummy:
If it's so obvious, sugar-smooch, why is it then not the Alias hunk? Think less established and far less sure of himself. Meanwhile, the randy guesses have been rocketing in like you wouldn't believe! <<--- Would you all consider JG "less established" than MV??

muchlove · February 19th, 2006, 03:13 PM

I agree, Wicked. Also, the big clue about Toothy not being at the Oscars last year... wasn't JG there?

He does talk about Jake a lot, though, which makes me wonder... and HE thinks he's handsome.

sauron · February 19th, 2006, 03:27 PM

Jake has to be the most obvious choice

consider this clue:

Dear Ted:
I've been surfing the Internet for 10 years, and you have the amazing knack of putting into words exactly what the public is thinking. Well, those of us with brain cells still left. Hey, is Toothy Tile Hayden Christensen?
Cathie V.
Ohio

Dear Super-Ass-Smoocher:
Nice try, but ain't gonna work. Besides, H.C. is not the correct homo rising star. But C.V., I must tell you, you are by far the closest gay snoop to date. Congrats.

Closest? Hayden and jake both starred in a play called "This is our youth" back in 2000-2001. plus he basically just outed Hayden, as in "correct Homo" so two gay or bi young stars, whew!

muchlove · February 19th, 2006, 04:19 PM

Hayden was just sharing a room and an ugly sweater with Sienna Miller... I assumed that meant they were... extra friendly.

Now if all these guys were bisexual, I wouldn't be surprised at all... but bisexual isn't gay. Ted definitely seems the type to lump them into the gay category even if they're bi, though.

WickedHo · February 19th, 2006, 04:23 PM

Hey, Sauron: I just can't get passed the clue that Toothy Tile is "less established" than Michael Vartan. If anything, Jake Gyllenhaal is a bigger name than Vartan, so that rules out JG as TT. IMO. And I also remember something about a TT blind item somewhere in WeHo during the Oscar ceremonies, at which JG was a presenter. So he couldn't've been in two places at once.

By the way: Welcome to the site! Glad to have you!

LynnieD · February 19th, 2006, 07:01 PM

I'm so glad someone else has added their two cents to this--welcome to the debate Sauron! I have been ITCHING for any additional TT news/stuff and it has made me a wee bit angry that Ted seems to have just forgotten about him......and I thought I was the only one who noticed! Whew!
Anywho, the Hayden Christensen comment was extremely interesting, as was the 'less established' than Vartan. The only thing I can think of, was when the Vartan comment was made, JG wasn't nearly as known then. This TT stuff has been going on for maybe 2 yrs right? And honestly, mainstream America probably has just gotten to know JG in the last few years....so it's possible, given the fact that Michael Vartan was on a 'hit' show 'Alias' and JG was doing movies like 'Bubbleboy' that JG could be considered less established AT THAT TIME. Does that make any kinds of sense?????

GOD I HATE TED! JUST TELL US FOR GODS SAKE!

sauron · February 19th, 2006, 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WickedHo

Hey, Sauron: I just can't get passed the clue that Toothy Tile is "less established" than Michael Vartan. If anything, Jake Gyllenhaal is a bigger name than Vartan, so that rules out JG as TT. IMO. And I also remember something about a TT blind item somewhere in WeHo during the Oscar ceremonies, at which JG was a presenter. So he couldn't've been in two places at once.

By the way: Welcome to the site! Glad to have you!

OK, at the time ted wrote this, Jake was not the hot shit that he is now. i think this was november or october of 2005, Jake had only one big national recognized movie, in which he wasnt a lead, just a supporting character, Day After Tomorrow. Vartan could have been more recognized because he had that JLO movie that was a hit and was in Alias, 2 recognized mediums. as far as the oscar thing, people dont usually complain about oscar gowns and hosts the same day, it was probably two days or the next day that he did this.

WickedHo · February 20th, 2006, 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sauron

OK, at the time ted wrote this, Jake was not the hot shit that he is now. i think this was november or october of 2005, Jake had only one big national recognized movie, in which he wasnt a lead, just a supporting character, Day After Tomorrow. Vartan could have been more recognized because he had that JLO movie that was a hit and was in Alias, 2 recognized mediums. as far as the oscar thing, people dont usually complain about oscar gowns and hosts the same day, it was probably two days or the next day that he did this.

You and LynnieD have interesting points. Veeeery interesting! I'm still not sure, though, if JG was "less established" than MV less than 6 months ago, though (if we're talking about Ted's blind items from Oct/Nov 2005). Sure, MV was on the hit show Alias, but he wasn't a series regular until 2005 (according to Imdb.com) Whereas JG already had an indie hit with Donnie Darko (2001), and The Day After Tomorrow was out in 2004. It wasn't even until summer '05 that I knew Michael Vartan by name. 'Course, that ain't sayin' much...

pinkdiamondgrl · February 20th, 2006, 01:16 PM

I think no doubt JG was way more established and well known than Michael Vartan one, oven two years ago. Think Donnie Darko, The Good Girl, Day after Tommorow. No way can we convince ourselves Michael Vartan was ever more well known than JG, IMHO. So this ladss me to believe its not JG unless Ted isn't playing by the rules here and fibbing here and there to keep the fervor alive.

Either Ted fibbed there to throw us off track, or maybe he is deliberatley avoiding confronting questions/emails about JG to make us think its clearly think it's him, when in reality its someone else?

But WHO then?

LynnieD · February 20th, 2006, 01:36 PM

I hate Ted. Lets kill him. Or slap him silly until he tells us who TT is.....