Ted C. Blind 02/14/07

**feedthepilot** · February 14th, 2008, 09:58 PM

Sorry if this was a dup, but I didn't see it posted yet:

Death-Mint Myrtle is the successful star of small and big screen. But it’s her addicting show, At Home with Hate, that—even though some jealous bitches say is past its prime, à la DMM—it’s really put Deathy back on the glossier maps. Hate is still a ratings force to be reckoned with on prime time, no BS. Now, Death-Mint might be enjoying the spotlight, but she’s still got a slew of secrets up her size-zero sleeves that are slowly slipping out. This actress’ apparently hideous eating habits are getting to be such a prob, not only for her feeble frame but for her fellow coworkers on the hit show.

See, the crew is quite inconvenienced whenever DMM has a scene, since it takes an extralong time to stage the camera angles just so—so that Ms. Myrtle’s obvious dubious health isn’t so noticeable to the naive TV viewer at home. “We have to make it look like she actually has a chest, sometimes,” bitched one totally in the know Hate worker-bee, and he wasn’t talkin’ boobs, honey-pies.

However, Myrtle might be battling an unfortunate mastication sitch, along with some unfair double standards. Despite her skinny skeleton, our girl’s handling the aging process quite well—offscreen. But in TV land, normal lifelines don’t fly. Wrinkles and creases in Myrtle’s forehead, due to her wilting frame, are blurred out in postprod of the show, since makeup sure can’t cover every little unwanted bit. The question to ponder is why the show’s producers are even trying so hard, when DMM is always being upstaged by her cuter costars.
Oh, of course, guess they like the tension on camera. What a doofus question. Forget we asked.

And It Ain't: Joely Fisher, Tina Fey or Mariska Hargitay

**MontanaMama** · February 14th, 2008, 10:15 PM

Teri Hatcher?

**qwerty** · February 14th, 2008, 10:44 PM

I find Ted's prose so tedious. I think it's Joely Richardson. She's gotten scary skinny in the past year.

**Natalie** · February 14th, 2008, 11:03 PM

Originally Posted by qwerty

I find Ted's prose so tedious.

I am thinking of marketing a product specifically for purpose
of relieving the headaches we experience after reading the
brain scrambling Blind he presents:

**sparkly** · February 14th, 2008, 11:13 PM

This could definitely be Teri Hatcher.

**gossipbebeh** · February 14th, 2008, 11:24 PM

Teri Hatcher sounds right to me too, definitely sounds like someone on Desperate housewives. Nicolette isn't that skinny is she?

**MissVenus** · February 14th, 2008, 11:33 PM

Teri Hatcher.

**qwerty** · February 14th, 2008, 11:35 PM

Ted says its a successful star of the small AND big screen. The implication is that the actress is known for her film roles. Teri does have movie roles to her credit but I had to look them up. She is strictly a TV actress in my mind.

Re-reading the blind again, I can see how Teri would be the obvious choice. However, Ted (unlike Perez) does not usually make his blinds more obvious. I'm still thinking this could be someone else.

**Natalie** · February 15th, 2008, 12:00 AM

Originally Posted by qwerty

Ted says its a successful star of the small AND big screen. The implication is that the actress is known for her film roles. Teri does have movie roles to her credit but I had to look them up. She is strictly a TV actress in my mind.

Re-reading the blind again, I can see how Teri would be the obvious choice. However, Ted (unlike Perez) does not usually make his blinds more obvious. I'm still thinking this could be someone else.

She was in one of my favorite movies "The Big Picture" it was some
years ago but at one time she mainly did films.

**Sarzy** · February 15th, 2008, 03:34 AM

It seems like it's Teri Hatcher.

**cherrybaby** · February 15th, 2008, 07:41 AM

Originally Posted by qwerty

Ted says its a successful star of the small AND big screen. The implication is that the actress is known for her film roles. Teri does have movie roles to her credit but I had to look them up. She is strictly a TV actress in my mind.

Re-reading the blind again, I can see how Teri would be the obvious choice. However, Ted (unlike Perez) does not usually make his blinds more obvious. I'm still thinking this could be someone else.

I also think it's not Teri (or if it is, Ted hasn't written it very well to match her - always a possibility). She hasn't been "successful star of small and big screen." She's been in quite a few movies but not that many recently, and she's hasn't been in a bona fide hit since Spy Kids (2001) in which she was not a lead. And there's the part about "our girl’s handling the aging process quite well—offscreen." She was just involved in a lawsuit about endorsing (or not endorsing?) lip plumpers. She is not someone who strikes me as being at ease with her aging. And she's not looking as skinny as she has in the past (from 3 weeks ago.

Joely Richardson from Nip/Tuck seems like a decent guess because there's been tabloid pics of how thin she's gotten, and Nip/Tuck doesn't have the buzz it used to, but she hasn't had a successful movie in a while, so I don't know.

**Chilly Willy** · February 15th, 2008, 07:46 AM

Sally Field?

**Tati** · February 15th, 2008, 09:20 AM

Sally Field?

I was waiting for someone to suggest Calista Flockhart actually, but I really don't think it's anyone on Brothers and Sisters because of the clues to the show. The title wouldn't fit at all, and B&S isn't past its prime, it's just in its second season and is still picking up steam. And the producers wouldn't want on-camera tension between characters (at least the female ones) since they're supposed to be family with pretty good relationships. I wouldn't think of Sally as being upstaged in the looks department, since she's playing their mother after all.

I like the Joely or Teri guesses, or maybe Ellen Pompeo? I'm wondering what this means:

“We have to make it look like she actually has a chest, sometimes,” bitched one totally in the know Hate worker-bee, and he wasn’t talkin’ boobs, honey-pies.

Does this mean she actually has (fake?) boobs, but not the chest to support them?

Death-Mint Myrtle is the successful star of small and big screen. But it’s her addicting show, At Home with Hate, that—even though some jealous bitches say is past its prime, à la DMM—it’s really put Deathy back on the glossier maps.

...

The question to ponder is why the show’s producers are even trying so hard, when DMM is always being upstaged by her cuter costars. Oh, of course, guess they like the tension on camera. What a doofus question. Forget we asked.