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Thread: What is your idea of beauty?

  1. #31
    Bronze Member delerium's Avatar
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    oh and im talking about looks alone btw, personality and confidence can change someone's perception on how attractive someone is dramatically.

  2. #32
    Elite Member Algernon's Avatar
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    I've only been told by a handful of men that I'm 'hot'. My husband tells me that daily. Bless his heart, at this point if only HE thinks I'm hot I am fine with it. I tend to think that the situations you put yourself in will dictate your feelings about this. There are many bars I avoid because they are filled with 'hot' women and horny men who ogle them and literally push the 'ugly' women like me aside to get to them. Who needs to be surrounded by that bullshit? Let them have each other! There is one bar near my house that I love to go to...it's got a great variety of people and many of the regulars go for the karaoke and the friendly atmosphere. Nothing like the meat markets that make an average woman feel like a peice of dog doo.

    And who is telling us what most men like and don't like? The media? I forget what site it is, maybe maxim.com or something, where celebrities are rated for their hotness by men. It was obvious from reading some of the ratings that men truly do find 'hotness' in many forms.
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  3. #33
    Gold Member princesspink's Avatar
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    I see where you are coming from Lily. The world(and not just men) has streamlined its standard of beauty and sexiness.

    Either way Im gonna have to agree with most posts around here. The guy who appreciates 'unconventional' beauty (by today's standards) is rare, but a good catch.

  4. #34
    Super Moderator Tati's Avatar
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    I'm not sure I even believe that anyone besides Playboy has really streamlined their standards of beauty though. If nothing else, don't we see far more women of diverse ethnicities in magazines today? There sure weren't a lot of black or Latina women on the magazine covers of the 'fifties. And it's not as though the body types of Old Hollywood were that diverse either. The movie stars back then may not have been as thin as our thinnest public figures today, but for the most part they all fit the "slender with moderate curves" look - pretty much all a size 6 or 8. Hair and makeup styles didn't vary much either.

    I really think it's more the "sex" industry that attempts to streamline the ideal of beauty, not the mass media or population as a whole - porn movies, porn mags. And they've pretty much espoused the same ideal for the last twenty years or so.
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  5. #35
    Gold Member princesspink's Avatar
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    As much as we see different ethnicites in the media round us I see a common thread running through them. Being stick thin is one of them. i cant remember the last time someone called a fat woman beautiful.

    As much as our sense of beauty had broadened it has also narrowed down.

  6. #36
    La vie en rose DitaPage*'s Avatar
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    Turning the tables here, what is the ideal man supposed to look like?

  7. #37
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    stayyoung& pretty

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  8. #38
    Hit By Ban Bus! pacific breeze's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by delerium View Post
    oh and im talking about looks alone btw, personality and confidence can change someone's perception on how attractive someone is dramatically.
    Agreed. I have a friend who's always been a bit overweight and has a rather plain face. But she is always perfectly groomed and dressed, and she has a personality that is open, friendly and upbeat. She radiates confidence and sass. She pretty much has to beat men off with a stick and never once have I heard one of them complain about her looks.

    You have to work with what you've got -- beauty fades, but personality and class will always stick around. There's no deoderant like success, or confidence.

  9. #39
    Bronze Member delerium's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by princesspink View Post
    As much as we see different ethnicites in the media round us I see a common thread running through them. Being stick thin is one of them. i cant remember the last time someone called a fat woman beautiful.
    thats because being fat is unhealthy and ugly, there's a difference between being shapely or solid and fat.

  10. #40
    Silver Member PlasticGirl's Avatar
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    U know, how does ANYONE overcome being 'pushed away by the ogling men to get past you to see the hot chicks' u have to have nerves of steel to sit and watch as the other women get attention. Even if u place more importance on your brains/personality its ingrained in every person to want to be desired. Life is hard, if u are quite overweight its unpleasant to the eye - no amount of nice personality gets you that first chance with a nice guy. We base our choices on first impressions.....
    Go sell crazy someplace else. We're all stocked up here...
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  11. #41
    Elite Member crumpet's Avatar
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    I'll add that I think that younger men, in general, feel peer pressure to like a certain type of look that is being promoted as 'hot'. It's like they think they are supposed to hoot and holler at the sight of big boobs and blonde hair, even if they don't think the chick is all that pretty. I think there is also a degree of getting 'guy points'for scoring a chick that meets the 'criteria', hence the 'trophy wife' syndrome. I find that as men get older they notice the subtle things about women that make us beautiful.

  12. #42
    Elite Member Ravenna's Avatar
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    "There is no great beauty that hath not some strangeness to the proportion." William Blake said that, and I totally agree. I think Audrey Tautou IS beautiful- look at my avatar and tell me she is not beautiful She's cute too, but that is as much her personality as her looks. Cookie cutter faces bore me.

  13. #43
    Elite Member crumpet's Avatar
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    I also believe media saturation has altered peoples' sense of what is normal and of what is hot. If people are inundated with manufactured images of airbrushed people who look flawless, it becomes the norm to look at flawless faces and bodies. Reality becomes distorted over time, much in the same way that 24/7 media coverage of a few kidnappings makes us thing that kids are being abducted left and right and that it is happening with greater frequency when it actually isn't.

    I think that media saturation promotes the idea that there is always something better out there. The fame obsessed culture promotes the idea that attention=power, even negative attention is better than being anonymous. The increased availability and acceptance of plastic surgery has gradually led many people to 'expect' that anyone with less than ideal features get them 'fixed' since science has provided the means to do so. We are more aware than ever in history of what is out there, thus we compare ourselves to others more than we ever have (this applies to consummerism in general). As we become more comfortable because our basic needs of food,clothing, and shelter are met we aspire to loftier and more shallow goals. Life seems to be about one-upmanship.

    I agree that every culture and era has had its own beauty ideals, but in the past the ideals were more attainable and more tolerant of imperfections because most people didn't have their flaws erased by ps and technology didn't allow for all the airbrushing we see today. There are also more people so there is more competition for everything, including mates.

    Let's not forget that the beauty industry relies on us feeling inadequate so that we continue to want their products and services. Thus, it is in their best interest to make the ideal as far from reality as possible so that people will continue to make them rich.

  14. #44
    Silver Member PlasticGirl's Avatar
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    Crumpet, your posts are as always - very well said!
    Go sell crazy someplace else. We're all stocked up here...
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  15. #45
    Hit By Ban Bus! pacific breeze's Avatar
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    The fact remains that the average person is just that -- average. Making the best of what we have is the most any of us can do. If some men or women can't accept that, that's their problem. Most of us dream of an ideal man or woman, but in reality, we end up with someone much like us -- imperfect, but real.

    I think this kind of stuff gets easier with age. I know that I strive to look and feel my best, and that I look much younger than my age. It doesn't hurt my feelings if I go somewhere and I'm not the centre of attention, or my looks don't appeal to someone. All we have to do is to look around to see that the vast majority of men and women are perfectly willing, and maybe even happy, to settle for someone who is as "average" as they are.

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