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Thread: Mothers and daughters and beauty

  1. #46
    Elite Member NHKMM's Avatar
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    My mom modeled too when she was young, although she never cared much for her looks, she doesn't even wear make up. She's still very pretty and looks good for her age (50 this year)
    She's always said (and still does lol) how great/beautiful/smart we are - I believe it gave us a lot of confidence, especially when we were kids.
    Here are some old pics of hers:

    Last edited by NHKMM; April 1st, 2007 at 04:37 AM.

  2. #47
    Elite Member Chalet's Avatar
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    Picara - I saw Arlene Dahl at a hotel about 10 years ago. That woman carried herself like she was a queen. There was something about the 50's and 60's where women looked so pulled together.

    NHKMM - Your mom is so lovely. A natural beauty. She must look very youthful today. Looks like she adores her little girl

    Quote Originally Posted by Mira View Post
    She's very attached to me looking proper to her friends and extended family.
    I truly believe that lots of mothers want their daughters to look and be a certain way because they really feel they are a reflection of them. Everything from a daughter being overweight, underweight, leaving the house not looking their best, not using their full potential......mother's often feel let down.

    The bond can be so strong.....and we as daughters sometimes spend a lifetime proving "I'm not YOU"! But in a way we are. Much moreso than their sons.

    I remember when my grandmother was in the hospital. I visited everyday when in college. You know what a sloppy college student can look like. She told me that it
    made her feel good if I wore a little lip gloss and had my hair neater. Even in the hospital she cared about that! So I did it of course.

    There must be a way to find a happy medium instead of fighting over how we should be, act, look.

  3. #48
    Elite Member sherbear905's Avatar
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    Here's my mom and her kids last year (not the best pic of her). She's 68, very thin, fit, and healthy. She's the one mentioned earlier that's had PS on several ocassions. (She was always asking the doctors to make her nose like mine.) We've tried to get her to change her hair, but each time we take her to get a "style", she hates it, and returns to this fuzzy stuff.



  4. #49
    Elite Member NHKMM's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chalet View Post
    NHKMM - Your mom is so lovely. A natural beauty. She must look very youthful today. Looks like she adores her little girl
    Hehe thanks She does look good today, very nice skin.

    And it's her nephew and a boy, btw lol

  5. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by NHKMM View Post
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    lovely bride pic NHKMM

  6. #51
    Elite Member Chalet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NHKMM View Post
    Hehe thanks She does look good today, very nice skin.

    And it's her nephew and a boy, btw lol
    One dumbstick on my head please!

    Later on today I thought...How could NHK have been at the wedding? I mean, you could have...but, nah.

  7. #52
    Elite Member NHKMM's Avatar
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    LOL! I'm a guy too

  8. #53
    Elite Member NHKMM's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xoxo View Post
    lovely bride pic NHKMM
    Thank you

  9. #54
    Elite Member nycgirl's Avatar
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    my mom did the same thing, and she was always commenting on her own weight and other womens weight- and trust me this has had a huge effect on my eating patterns and self image

    [QUOTE=CollegeStudent;608422][QUOTE=VenusInFauxFurs;600880]Really? Then why do so many mothers put healthy and "normal" girls on diets from a young age. Or continually project their own insecurities upon their daughters?

    My mom put me on a diet when I was in grade 5 till out of high school. Except she would never and still doesn't call it a diet, she says you're just eating healthy now, but really it was a diet from whatever diet book was popular at the time. I think by not calling it a diet she felt better about doing it and looked like a better parent, like she was more concerned about health than looks.

    She always told me I was beautiful though, but I still think her actions speak louder than words.

  10. #55
    La vie en rose DitaPage*'s Avatar
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    My mum is one of the most, if not THE most, critical people i know. She is always commenting on appearances and says things like 'the nicest girl, so gorgeous', as if being beautiful was the most important thing, not her personality. My mum has always told me I'm beautiful but she doesn't understand how much her criticizing appearances of everyone behind their back upset me, because it made me think she'd talk about me behind my back too.

    She's also more 'exotic' looking than i am, being italian, and people have said to me that she's prettier than me, which is hurtful to hear because you dont want to be jealous of your mum, but it happens when people start comparing you to her. And she got a nose job (kind of- she broke her nose and when the doctor fixed it, he tweaked it and i dont think it was a drastic tweak but it made her face look even better) and porcelain veneers on her teeth and can afford to dress better than I can, so she usually looks better. She's glamorous too where as i couldn't give a shit about dressing up all the time. I dont know if its jealousy but ive noticed that if someone compliments me in her presence she kind of scowls, which is very hurtful. But if she gets the compliment shes all smiles and keeps reminding me of it.


    She also big notes herself all the time, probably without realizing it. She goes on and on about the young men who hit on her and the fact that they're so SHOCKED to learn she's 47, and how hot she is.


    Oh and she is tanned and I'm pale, which people seem to look down on me for. They act like being tanned is the greatest thing in the world and that Mum looks so amazing, blah blah.

  11. #56
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    ^It is precisely this kind of story, along with my own, that made me vow never to do that to my daughter. And I haven't. She's the better for it. Mothers need to support their daughters, not compete with them. My mother never seemed to grasp that concept and it's beyond sad - it's pathetic. She'll go to her grave competing with me instead of just relaxing and enjoying the relationship. It's important to remember that the cycle of dysfunction in a family can be broken. It's not easy, but it can be done.

  12. #57
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    I have a mother who is beautiful. She is 64 and still has her beauty. She wears no make-up and is still stunning. I find myself staring at her
    sometimes. Anyhow, growing up I looked nothing like her and people were always quick to point it out. Letting me know it was a damn shame that her only daughter didn't get any of her beauty. I swear some people can be horribly insensitive. Who says that to someone?
    My saving grace is that my mother always made me feel beautiful and never anything less. To this day I am still compared to her. One of my aunts told me I was pretty and the other aunt said she was going to send me a picture of my mom to show me that my mother was far more beautiful at my age. Unreal. I am lucky that my mom instilled a great sense of self and self-esteem. The only thing my mother said she has ever been jealous of me is that I went to college and she didn't. Other than that she is my greatest supporter. God I love that woman.
    Last edited by Lucky32; May 8th, 2007 at 12:21 AM.

  13. #58
    Elite Member NHKMM's Avatar
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    ^Your mom sounds like a wonderful person

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