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Thread: What is your idea of beauty?

  1. #1
    Hit By Ban Bus! Lily's Avatar
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    Default Change in the standard of beauty? When? Why?

    I was thinking about how drastically our standard of beauty has changed within the last 50 years.

    Every single day I am compared to Audrey Tautou. Who is considered "cute" but not beautiful. Who is considered beautiful (or "HOT" as we say now).....? Women like Stacy Keibler who is absolutely boring. Pretty, yes, but boring.

    There used to be room for ALL kinds of women to be considered "hot" or "beautiful." Veronica Lake and Ava Gardner and Audrey Hepburn and Grace Kelly and Vivien Leigh and Ingrid Bergman....But now, all the women who are considered "beautiful" are, frankly, generically pretty and all look the same.

    Girls like me are not considered beautiful. You have to have a tan, have long silky hair and pretty face. Heaven forbid your face has any character, then your looks are demoted to "attractive" or "exotic," which is an insult.

    Not that it's bad. I mean, I could be terribly ugly. I'm just thinking. I wish we didn't categorize women so much this way. I think it's awful that we don't have room to accept that beauty comes in all shapes and sizes.

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    I remember when "Amelie" came out, I was asked if I'd seen the movie that had my twin in it. So apparently I look a lot like Audrey Tatou, too, though I'm not compared to her every single day. I take it as a compliment that I look like a pretty French actress. I'd rather look like Audrey Tatou, than some generic all-American bimbo cutie.

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    Hit By Ban Bus! Lily's Avatar
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    Most likely, I need to change my attitude. I just get really down on my looks because sometimes, secretly, I want to be a Hot Girl. And that will NEVER EVER happen.

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    Hit By Ban Bus! ediebrooks's Avatar
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    I know what you mean. I've always wanted blond hair and blue eyes, but that wasn't in the genetic cards for me. I won't bleach my hair because it would look just too fake and cheap and wouldn't go with my coloring anyway. I'm not sure if I want to be a Hot Girl. I like my privacy too much.

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    SVZ
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    Men tend to judge beauty differently than women though.

    I've seen a lot of guys lust after women who other women don't consider attractive at all.

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    See I'm not sure I agree with you on a few things.

    That Stacey Keibler chick is definitely considered hot but definitely not considered strikingly beautiful. The two are just plain different. Men are more often going to blur the two together but any woman would know the difference.

    I don't think its just the long silky hair chicks that get all the attention either. Keira Knightley, with her cropped cut, small breasts, pale skin, and unique features is worshipped by many men!!!

    I think the "everyone only likes tan, blonde, blue-eyed..." complaints are a little played out to be honest, think of the hottest women in pop culture right now--Giselle, Adriana, Angelina, Jessica Alba.

    Adding to that, I'm not quite sure how you could say that 'exotic' is considered anything less than breathtakingly beautiful. I've never heard it in any negative connotation, to be honest.

    I'm 21 and if you're around my age at all I hope you're not just basing all this on the guys in our age demographic, lol. They're mostly creeps when it comes to girls. I was rudely told yesterday by a couple 20 something douchebags that I needed to go to outside more often as I looked sick and then today was told by a grown man that I was beautiful like a perfect little snow angel doll lol Disclude the horndogs and think of all the different types of people who have told you that you are beautiful. They are the only ones that matter.
    "Give me your love and I'll give you--the Perfect Love Song!"

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    Hit By Ban Bus! Lily's Avatar
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    I don't know. People see my pics, or see me perform (I'm a singer/songwriter) and they say, oooh like a little doll. But yet, I'm not considered Hot or Beautiful. I think that people really believe chicks like Keibler, and whomever are "beautiful." They're really not. They're not ugly, they're just not....beautiful.

    Actually, the women you mentioned: Giselle, Jessica Alba, Adriana---Look I said NOTHING about blonde hair and blue eyes being the standard. But the women you mentioned are long, tall, skinny, with long legs and Jessica Alba is another who is merely pretty, but considered "beautiful." Giselle--well that's interesting because some think she's gorgeous and some think she's mannish. But she's not built like a woman. Angelina is tall, skinny, with long silky hair.

    Nobody has character anymore, is what I mean.
    And yes, "exotic" and "attractive" now are used as back-handed compliments. Just like "curvy" has been high-jacked to mean "overweight."

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    Elite Member VenusInFauxFurs's Avatar
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    I'd rather look like Audrey Tautou than say Jessica Simpson or any of those tanned, bleach blonde girls. They are truly a dime a dozen.

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    Jeez sorry to be honest I don't think you want to be proved wrong so much lol

    I'll tell you right now if anyone tells you that you look like a little doll they are telling you that you are beautiful!!! I get it all the time and I never once thought it to mean anything but that they admired my features, skin? I'm assuming the same goes for you? Don't you try to tell me now that they are really throwing an insult when they compare you to a doll. I'm sorry I just won't have it.

    Hot is a different story. I'll agree with you that most of the emphasis today is on hot. But the way I got over it??? I just decided that I like myself the way I am. I'm short, pale, with a little kid's face, shy and goofy!!! and that's what people like me for, it's what I like me for If I had been blessed with long legs tan skin and bedroom eyes I just wouldn't be the same. Even with the same personality things would just be different. Why don't you just put a little faith in who you are and stop worrying about being 'hot'?

    I should probably add: do you only consider tall men with perfect features and totally ripped bodies (lol silly I know but...) hot? I know I don't bat an eyelash at those guys. If I see their pictures in a magazine I may drool for a second but in real life I find the quirky little guy with the CUTE smile irresistable!

    I hope you realize I'm on your side with all this, I just wish you'd realize that everyone else is too!
    "Give me your love and I'll give you--the Perfect Love Song!"

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    Hit By Ban Bus! Lily's Avatar
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    It's different for men. Men don't have to be considered perfect to be considered sexy or desirable. But women....especially within the last ten years....should have long hair, should be tan, and should basically look like they stepped out of a magazine.

    That's the standard now. I'm sure it will change again, but by that time, I'll be, like, fifty. I'm 31 now, and so it's not appealing for guys to look at a 31 year old who looks like a doll. It's just not. I mean, I don't dress like a kid, but I don't have that Hot Chick thing going. You're right, maybe I'm thinking too much about it. But I haven't gone on a date in two years, and when I ask someone what can be done about it, they tell me to grow my hair out and change my wardrobe and lighten my hair. That's not fair.

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    Okay well in that case where the heck do you live that no one finds you attractive? lol Because I'm almost positive that can't truly be the case! Are you shy at all? Some men find that intimidating and are only able to muster up the courage to ask out the smiling, 'definite yes' girls. Go ahead and get bold, lol.

    You shouldn't have to change your wardrobe, hair, and skin color to find someone that likes you. They only do that for good television
    "Give me your love and I'll give you--the Perfect Love Song!"

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    SVZ
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    All you need to be hot is big boobs.

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    Hit By Ban Bus! Lily's Avatar
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    Oh good! I have big boobs. LOL

    But seriously. I do.

    Anyway. I just think it's funny that women who would have been considered plain or common or generic are now considered "gorgeous." It's interesting.

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    SVZ
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    Maybe it's just the people you know. I think there are local societal differences.

    Most people know that the people who they show on TV aren't the most "gorgeous" people on the planet.

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    Really-all you need is to THINK you are beautiful and walk like it. I have seen very plain women(ann curry on NBC comes to mind) that everyone falls over. They just walk it,project it,radiate it! If you start noticing-their hands are always graceful, they are perfectly groomed and smiling as if they know a great secret. They do-they are happy with themselves. Try this: hold your head up.Walk into a room as if you own it. Smile.Make eye contact.Trust me, men will come out from every direction. One more secret: men love good conversation. Stay up to date, listen to the news while you do your make up. Oh yes-be a little self centered. Men love it-the more time you spend on yourself the better. ONE MORE THING: NEVER complain about yourself or point out a flaw. NEVER.
    I didn't start out to collect diamonds, but somehow they just kept piling up.-Mae West

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