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Thread: Accepting non-changeable physical flaws

  1. #1
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    Default Accepting non-changeable physical flaws

    weird question..do any of you guys struggle to accept things about yourself that you cannot change?
    i am struggling with this.
    there are lots of things you can change with weight loss/make-up/ps, but there are some features you obviously can't change, like your height or the length of your arms/legs or things llike that.
    i don't want to say exactly what the flaw is (*embatrrassing*) but i am getting a little impatient with myself for not being able to accept it.
    i compare myself to other people who don't have this flaw, feel like they are better, etc...it's so stupid.
    how can i stop doing this?
    any advice?
    has anyone overcome an extreme dislike of something physical about themselves?

    i also have learned the truth of that saying that sometimes your biggest weaknesses turn out to be your strengths..that has proven true for me in the past..maybe i just haven't figured this out yet..
    i feel like i am wasting energey over this and i want to stop but i can't seem to stop thinking over it/wishing it were different.

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    Elite Member Dean James's Avatar
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    Is your flaw a perpetual stream of boogers coming out of your nose or something? One leg longer than the other? My imagination's going wild here not knowing what your secret flaw is.

    hmmm... i guess my biggest flaw is my hair. It's thin and I can't to anything to it. I've bought every plumping shampoo on the planet, layered it into little multi-leveled plateaus, nothing gives it any oomph.

    Thanks belong to my WASPy ass heritage and their penchant for living in dark, damp places where the outcome is a gene pool of albinos with thin, worthless hair.
    Baby, by the time you have kids and they're in school, no one will care about you.

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    I guess that would be a no then, huh Dean?!

    I can relate. The only thing that helped my hair in the past was a great gypsy perm, and now hair color. Only lasts two weeks in terms of better body, though.

    You hit the nail on the head with the booger item. You are amazing. I lived with that and incredible abuse in grade school. I have food sensitivities and my body over-produces mucous, it's disgusting and nothing can be done about it except pull a Dick Gregory and go off all mucous producing food. That and drugs. Hard cord pharmaceutical drugs. I've considered it, even though it could compromise my health and shorten my life. I've even called the Mayo Clinic about it. I'm afraid I'll never accept it, because it's hard to live with and embarrassing at times and offputting for men.

    I think what saves me is my irrepressible spirit. Without that, I'd be dead.

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    Elite Member Dean James's Avatar
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    Fuck perfection, hate whatever you want as long as you love yourself.
    Baby, by the time you have kids and they're in school, no one will care about you.

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    lol you guys are too funny..no dean, i don't have any nose problems or anything coming out of anwhere lol
    maybe this is one of those things i have to figure out myself..who knows.
    i would have more patience w/ myself if i were doing this at like 17, but i am 32!! insecurity over physical flaws has to end at some age doesn't it?
    please tell me it doesn.

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    Don't get me started on my J.Lo butt, my fingernails, my thighs, my pig snout nostrils... oh hell where's the razors.... (You guys know I'm just kidding!)

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    Elite Member Dean James's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xoxo View Post
    lol you guys are too funny..no dean, i don't have any nose problems or anything coming out of anwhere lol
    maybe this is one of those things i have to figure out myself..who knows.
    i would have more patience w/ myself if i were doing this at like 17, but i am 32!! insecurity over physical flaws has to end at some age doesn't it?
    please tell me it doesn.

    Freudian slip? you secretly don't want it to end?

    Nah, I think finding fault with oneself is natural. Humans are forever trying to improve, see: thumbs and simple tools. As long as you don't go crazy obsessing, that it doesn't take a dangerous turn and ruin your life, you should be fine.

    Keep yourself balanced, we all have something we hate about ourselves.
    Baby, by the time you have kids and they're in school, no one will care about you.

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    Look at it this way: the grass is always greener.
    I have curls and sometimes envy people with straight hair.
    When I tell them that, they always say they envy me for my curls.....

    Same goes for almost everything ranging from height to eyecolor.

    I always distract myself from MY irreparable(sp) flaws by thinking there's always
    somebody worse off than me....
    Warren Beatty: actor, director, writer, producer.

    ***** celeb

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    Plus with non-changeable physical attributes, there's always a flip side . I'm not wild about my oily skin, but the flip side is that it's slowed my aging, and it helps me to look at least 10 years younger.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ediebrooks View Post
    Plus with non-changeable physical attributes, there's always a flip side . I'm not wild about my oily skin, but the flip side is that it's slowed my aging, and it helps me to look at least 10 years younger.
    ^I have the exact same "problem"
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dean James View Post
    Is your flaw a perpetual stream of boogers coming out of your nose or something? One leg longer than the other? My imagination's going wild here not knowing what your secret flaw is.

    hmmm... i guess my biggest flaw is my hair. It's thin and I can't to anything to it. I've bought every plumping shampoo on the planet, layered it into little multi-leveled plateaus, nothing gives it any oomph.

    Thanks belong to my WASPy ass heritage and their penchant for living in dark, damp places where the outcome is a gene pool of albinos with thin, worthless hair.
    I have the EXACT same hair (and weak nails to go with it) and it's been the bane of my physical existence. Otherwise I am reasonably content with myself. Sure I'd like to be a little taller with less broad shoulders and hips, and a less round face, but I've learned to live with these flaws.

    I also have oily skin, although it is getting drier all the time. Boo hoo.

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    You will bless your oily skin when you hit 40 ladies. It knocks at least 10 years off the 'ageing' process provided you keep it well moisturised and you don't get any stupid ideas about sunbathing for hours every day.

    There's several things about myself I'm not thrilled about, but I don't obsess about it because they can't be changed.

    I guess this the time to wheel out that old favourite:

    Give me the Strength to change the things I can change;
    The Serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
    And the Wisdom to know the difference.
    I've never liked lesbianism - it leaves a bad taste in my mouth
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dean James View Post
    Freudian slip? you secretly don't want it to end?
    lol noooo i do want it to end.
    i really believe weaknesses end up being strengths..i just haven't figured out how to turn this one into a strength but i will haha..just a matter of time.
    thx for all the responses tho!!
    btw, for the thin-hair ladies, try henna. i am a henna-girl from age 14. it is messy and takes a while to apply, rinse off etc but it is worth it and will help your hair a lot.

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    I used to do that before my hair turned gray. It doesn't work on gray hair. Too bad. I like henna.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mira View Post
    Don't get me started on my J.Lo butt, my fingernails, my thighs, my pig snout nostrils... oh hell where's the razors.... (You guys know I'm just kidding!)
    You put those JeffingChrist razors down right now!!

    Or at the very least, keep them out of your nostrils- owie.
    Baby, by the time you have kids and they're in school, no one will care about you.

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