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Thread: Whale Sperm Shampoo

  1. #1
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    Default Whale Sperm Shampoo

    if you've got a hot date and you're wondering whether to get sperm in your hair before or after dinner, let me introduce: whale sperm shampoo...


    Q & S Whale Sperm Shampoo 16oz


    BRAND : Q & S View All Q & S Products
    Model No. : UPC. : 643473104204 Weight : 16oz/473ml Our Price : $3.99 Package Type : Bottle Qty. : EA

    Features & Specifications Made with natural extracts, whale sperm oil and vitamin E, this shampoo conditions your hair through continuous use. It is excellent for dry and damaged hair due to chemical processes and climate changes.
    ※Directions: Apply whale Sperm Shampoo over wet hair massaging the scalp. Rinse well with water.

    http://www.beautyofnewyork.com/shopp...0207KW1253.htm
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

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    Elite Member heart_leigh's Avatar
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    Oh, lovely. Just what I need. Whale sperm in my hair with all its protein goodness.
    Rock the fuck on!

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    Elite Member MohandasKGanja's Avatar
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    This would really boost my ego if I were a whale.

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    Elite Member BITTER's Avatar
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    Oh come, now, children (pun intended). That stuff isn't sperm.

    Sperm whale - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

    The name comes from the milky-white waxy substance, spermaceti, found in the animal's head, due to its resemblance to semen.
    Good luck getting a cat to do anything let alone join in on your sexcapades. - Air Quotes

  5. #5
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    ^^^
    no, this is whale sperm shampoo, not sperm whale shampoo.
    'esperma de ballena' means whale sperm. the spanish word for sperm whale would be 'cachalote'.

    "Made with natural extracts, whale sperm oil and vitamin E"
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

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    Gold Member Little Goon's Avatar
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    How do you get a job masterbating whales for the shampoo? I know that there are jobs masterbating chickens, I saw it on, "Dirty Jobs." But whales?

    I'd do it, but it would have to pay well due to the obvious risks involved.
    I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them. - George W. Bush

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    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    What fluffers do in between porno shoots.
    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    "What's traitors, precious?" -- President Gollum

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    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    Gross, but

    I wonder if it works...

  9. #9
    Elite Member MohandasKGanja's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Goon View Post
    How do you get a job masterbating whales for the shampoo? I know that there are jobs masterbating chickens, I saw it on, "Dirty Jobs." But whales?
    And what kind of material would you need to use to get them in the mood? A video of Rush Limbaugh skinnydipping in his private pool?

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    Elite Member BITTER's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sputnik View Post
    ^^^
    no, this is whale sperm shampoo, not sperm whale shampoo.
    'esperma de ballena' means whale sperm. the spanish word for sperm whale would be 'cachalote'.

    "Made with natural extracts, whale sperm oil and vitamin E"
    No, I think it's still from the spermaceti.
    Good luck getting a cat to do anything let alone join in on your sexcapades. - Air Quotes

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    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    i don't know if it's real or not but i do know that in spanish, 'esperma de ballena' means 'whale sperm', not a type of whale. whether or not they actually jerk off whales to make the stuff is another matter...
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

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    Elite Member ConstanceSpry's Avatar
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    I bet Elle McPherson uses it.

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    Elite Member MohandasKGanja's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sputnik View Post
    i don't know if it's real or not but i do know that in spanish, 'esperma de ballena' means 'whale sperm', not a type of whale. whether or not they actually jerk off whales to make the stuff is another matter...
    It also seems like the Spanish term for a sperm whale is "cachalote".

  14. #14
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    yup.
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

  15. #15
    Zee
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    Elite Member Zee's Avatar
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    Nope it's whale spunk

    Ingredients: Deionized water, Sodium Lauril Sulfate, Sodium Cloruro, Citric Acid, Whale Sperm, Vitamin E, D-Pantenol, FD&C Blue #1 Cert., Fragrance.

    PETA would surely protest the illegal harvesting of whale spunk,
    Drive a car, drive a boat, drive a plane. What does it matter? As long as I'm drunk!
    pəʇɐɔɐɯnpə ɹ ı

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