Quote:
Originally Posted by McJag
Adoptees must accept that some parents do not choose to be contacted. It has to be respected on either side. Best when they agree,but that will not always be the case.
This is a bad situation for both mother & daughter. An abortion would have ended all possibility.
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See this is the problem with our society and the media that continually comes up with these "heart warming" stories of adoptees seeking out their biological parents. It has almost conditioned the public into believing that it is a "noble cause" and eventual life goal for adoptees to seek their real parents.
It ain't like that at all.
And not only because of siuations like this, where the mother clearly did not want to be tracked down.
I'm of the belief that a child has a moral obligation to be loyal to the one that raised them, not their biological by default. These kids need to stop dreaming of these 'reality show' happy endings where people reunite after years apart.
Ultimately how do you think the parents that raised the adoptee feels when the child they raised as their own goes off on their happy little crusade to find biological? I understand we are all curious in life, and knowing that you are adopted I'm sure would pique anyone's interest. However, you need to be mature about it and take the whole picture into account, not be reckless about it.
I've mentioned this before multiple times but I'll never forget when NBA player Shaquille O'Neal first came on the scene as a pro and became a superstar. One day his biological father, who did not raise him, was on a talk show talking about Shaq and how he was proud of him and all that, trying to 'claim' him. Shaq was like, hell naw, he considered the man that raised him to be his real dad (and came out with a rap song called 'biological didn't bother.'). Now THAT is integrity and loyalty.