[Beeyotch]

Originally Posted by Sola

It sounds like everyone here is fantasizing about my identity. Oh, how delicious indeed! Now let me see. Shall I be Kevin Spacey or that Asian housewife? Keyser Söze or Madame Butterfly? Gloom and glory against exoticism and Puccini-esque romance… Mmmmm…

But I know what you’re all waiting for. Aren’t the gay / homophobic stalkers increasingly provocative on purpose? Okay then, I’m Kevin Spacey, and here is what I have to say. Better fasten your belts, my buddies, it might be a little tough. And a little long too. Here we go.

THE SPACEY HORROR MEDIA SHOW, part one.

I’m just trying to figure out why you people are so f*cking obsessed with my private life. I’m a rather ugly character actor, a theatre rat, a workaholic and a highbrow. Nothing glamorous or sexy about me, I’m an antistar. In spite of that, I’ve been generating for twelve years a buzz that keeps me incredibly hot in the public eye. I’m supposed to hide dark secrets, the backlash of my creepy onscreen image, I guess. I know I shouldn’t complain about it. It’s not so hard to deal with the morons who trash me. As Leonard Cohen says, “climb on your tears and be silent like a rose on its ladder of thorns”. It certainly costs me less than displaying my intimate life would. And then in real life people usually respect me, anyway, except, once in a while, for a fistful of cowards in the darkness of a theatre hall.

The main problem lies in the media sphere. Vicious circle. The tabloids and the internet feeding each other ad infinitum. Grapevine, guesswork, speculation, bluff and hoax. Everyone parroting their own version of old news, or claiming they have an inside knowledge and a juicy story to tell – as by chance. Can you imagine how odd it is to find oneself reflected in that prism?

Take that Capri thing, for instance. Most interesting indeed. On August 17, 2007, the New York Post runs a titbit that reads I’m cruising the island with a handsome young man (yeah, right, all my bodyguards should be women, a la Khadafi, you know). Three days earlier, on the other side of the pond, an Italian rag (Corriere del Mezzogiorno, 14 August, 2007) swore I’d been openly hitting on a beautiful woman in a cocktail bar. Back in the summer of 2006, as I was enjoying a short holiday in Ibiza, the Daily Mail claimed that a “spy” had seen me joined by eight (eight, no fewer!) tanned, muscular young males at the VIP area of the Km5 (a very select hetero place, though), while a few local witnesses were nicely surprised to spot me having a grand time with hot ladies at the famous Pacha nightclub. Do you know what? I’m just realising that the nature of gossip is truly a matter of culture… But where’s my reality, I’m asking you?
Of course, my gay / homophobic stalkers have already got all the answers: the guys are necessarily my lovers (yes, all of them!) and the girls are my beards. Or vice versa, because after all, I’m convinced that in our day and age gay is beautiful. Oh, by the way, I’m deeply offended at the assertion a few foul-brained people are making here that I might be a big bottom. If I were gay, I’d be the most flamboyant top who ever walked the planet. I’m a Leo, for Christ’s sake!

And how about the huge "gay scandal” the Star “revealed” after my second Oscar? Ha! Wanna see the pictures, guys? Here they are, but I warn you, don’t come back to me whining that I directed you to homophobic sites: this is truly the most aggressive and vulgar gay bashing I’ve ever seen about my little self on the internet. http://www.geocities.com/diabhalspacey/kevclimb.htm
Naturally, its author has selected the most “compromising” pics that were published by the tabloid. Watch them carefully, guys, using my friend Sola’s method, and be honest for once. Apart from that, I loved the hack’s work in the Star article, very imaginative. I hope that guy was gay himself and had a nice time jerking off with his right hand while typing with the left one. It’d be sad otherwise… I mean, if that hack was a straight man with an agenda to cook up homophobic tales (like that slavish Tom Junod who first outed me in Esquire). How depressing that kind of job must be! Ah well, those people have to eat too, I guess.

I could also talk at length about the 2004 “incident” near the Geraldine Mary park in London, but I think you might be better enlightened by just going to one of the very best sites for gay propaganda, and read all the comments on this page: http://www.queerty.com/the-truth-about-kevin-spaceys-attack-20070913/

Raging controversy, as you can see.

Enough for today. Next episode: me and my girlfriends (and boyfriends, natch). Stay tuned!

PS: Please, Sojiita, don’t be mean to Penname. S/he’s a special friend of mine.

Sooooo...Kevin's Spacey is teh ghey?

I'm sorry, maybe my tiny, narrow mind misunderstood your Very Sophisticated, Impeccably Sourced and Terribly Self-important Journalist-piece up there.